How to Become a Public Washroom Ninja

Bike: 11 km – Run: 1 km

Monthly Total: 320 km

Bonus Activity: Ultimate Frisbee

My go-to excuse for not biking to work used to be: “It’s too difficult for me to clean up at work. I’m a professional, yo.” Now, I get ready at work like a champ! Since I started cycling early this year, I commute with ease. Plus, I give myself extra time in the morning, so I can meander and stay cool. When I arrive, I hang out in my cubicle long enough for my computer to start up. Then, I grab my lululemon bag of goodies from my desk and swagger to the washroom. I clean up, straight up, stealth like ninja.

Here’s how to become a Public Washroom Ninja:

• Choose your stall. A roomie shower stall is optimal, but the larger corner stall will do the trick. The more room the better.
• Get down to your knickers. Remove all your biker clothing at once – no individual swapping of  wet clothing for dry clothing. It gives you an opportunity to be free and airy. Throw the wet clothes over the door.
• Towel off the bod. Hand towel or paper towel will do the trick. Dabby, dab some antiperspirant while you’re at it.
• At this point, about 45 seconds has passed. (Ninjas are quick!) Throw on the minimal level of clothing before you high kick through the stall door. Note, balance is key. If you can master tree pose, you’ll avoid weird barefoot touches, where even feet dare not go.
• Cartwheel over to the sinks, preferably an out-of-the way corner spot. Pull out your bag of goodies. I personally have a travel blow dryer to reduce helmet hair, a comb, some hair serum, and some powder make-up. Shine be gone!
• Hide the evidence. Throw the wet clothes in your pannier bag and pack-up the prep tools.
• Suit-up. Grab the blazer, sweater, scarf or whatever remains to finish your look.
• Leave no trace. Do a quick review of your stall and sink. Ninjas do not leave any embarrassing personal items behind.

That is how it’s done boys and girls! I manage this in 5 minutes flat. Proceed to strike, block, and grapple your way back to your desk. No one will be the wiser that the once sweaty mess is now – the professional, styling vision before them. Ninja styling.